Narcissus and the Mad

by Renoe Alexander

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credits

released September 21, 2010

All tracks written and performed by Renoe Alexander, except track 10 (words by A. Rimbaud, music by Renoe Alexander)
© All rights reserved, Renoe Alexander, 2010

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Track Name: Town With No Cheer
Never said goodbye when I left for three years
Never saw you cry when I let you down, my dear
And these are the days we get to rebuild
From the town with no cheer
From the booze all so queer

Never said goodbye and I'd take back each day
To make it up my dear, to show you I'll be here for you
Cos those were the days we tried to rebuild
From the town with no cheer
From the pain all so real

Never said goodbye to the kid I once knew
To the boy gazing clouds, to your best friend you knew
But these are the days we get to rebuild
From the town with no cheer
From the lost past few years
Track Name: Salt
My fingers won't move fast enough
To keep you happy with this song
Like the friendship we once had
I'll fuck it up and then I'm sad

My voice will shake and fall from tune
Don't mind the faults, don't mind the gloom
Cut the ties that we once had
These bloody wrists I used to have

Articulate, I used to be
I lost the words you gave to me
Pound for pound, you came out first
I had more to lose to pay the cost

I hope to see you fall in love
And I hope he's sweet
I hope he's worth the silence I have caused us here
I'll bite my tongue and smile dear for you

I'll be the one who plays the clown
You know my fears and here I'll drown in tears I cry Feel bad for me
Cos I'm the one who needs the 'tention babe

I'll find the wave we'll meet upon
I'll sit atop the crest and watch you float away
And as you do I'll salt the sea
I'll blur the view
Track Name: Goodbye London
New York started a spiral to the bottom of a hole
I fell apart like a virus was tearing at my soul
You grew stronger eating at my bones
Now I'm the loneliest friend that you have ever known

Paris failed, but I guess I should have known
These old wet streets are for to walk alone
You grew stronger eating at my bones
Now I'm the loneliest friend that you'll never know

Goodbye London, guess we'll never see
All the puddles flooding past my feet
Here I falter with this whoa is me
I'm just the loneliest friend you'll never need
Track Name: I Just Run Away
I wish I could find you
Who loves me all the time
So I could just break you
And rot your shallow mind

I want you to know that
I find you interesting
You're so sweet I'm sickened
Thank God for self relief

I wanted to know you
To laugh at jokes in bed
But what if I knew you
Would I have hurt you bad

You found me I wasn't
Prepared for what you'd do
If I fell hard for you
If I had wanted you

It's funny that I was
Cursed to this addiction
Where fame, sex and money
Run wild constantly

The girls they run to me
And I just run away
The boys want to do me
And I just run away
Track Name: Giant Lullaby
Come here, sit by my side
I'll hold you tight till each tear in you's dry

You don't need to fear the giant
You don't need to fear the light
You don't need to fear the giant
You don't need to fear the night
Track Name: Running Away With the Circus
I'm runnin' away with the circus
Miles in the air turnin' upside down and
Raising my arms to applause and bowing

Running away to Neptune
Going away to somewhere blue and
Raising my hands in applause for the bright stars

Waters are black and
Ground is a-shakin'
Temperatures rising
But I'm fighting on

Waters are black and
Ground is a-shakin'
Temperatures rising
But I'm fighting on

But I'm runnin' away with the circus
We'll get there first and turn it all around and
Raising our arms one by one and standing
Track Name: Paper
Blackened eyes, they look at me
Through walls of paper thin disease
I can't hear their cries they cry
You won't feel their blood gone dry

Stacking men in lego towers
Wash the mud from off the flowers
I can't see their life transpired
You won't see the bloodied wires
Track Name: Don't Give Me Up
You love 'em to their faces
Then you lie to their backs
You try to love 'em baby
You're a selfish little prick

Don't bring me down
Don't let me down
Don't give me up

You give yourself a name
Fill your demons full of shit
You take cold tubs to calm you
Write your music on a whim

Don't bring me down
Don't let me down
Don't give me up

You come to see me baby
I'm a bit narcissistic
You come to see me baby
I don't really give a shit
Track Name: Moon Song
Think I might move to the moon
Be all alone, best go soon
Look to the Earth and see Neptune blue
Think I might move to the moon

Think I might gaze at the Earth one day
Wonder how we let her slip away
I'm here alone in the blue
Living my life on the moon
Track Name: Dance of the Hanged Men (The Skeletons of Saladins)
Sir Beelzebub pulls by the scruff

His little black puppets who grin at the sky,

And with a backhander in the head like a kick,

Makes them dance, dance, to an old Carol-tune !
And the puppets, shaken about,
entwine their thin arms:

Their breasts pierced with light,
like black organ-pipes

Which once gentle ladies pressed to their own,

Jostle together protractedly in hideous love-making.
Hurray ! the gay dancers,
you whose bellies are gone !

You can cut capers on such a long stage ! 

Hop ! never mind whether it's fighting or dancing !

Beelzebub, maddened, saws on his fiddle !
Hurrah !
Beelzebub, maddened, saws on his fiddle !
Hurrah !
the wind whistles at the skeletons' grand ball !

The black gallows moans like an organ of iron !

The wolves howl back from the violet forests:

And on the horizon the sky is hell-red...
Oh ! but see how from the middle of this
Dance of Death

Springs into the red sky a great skeleton, mad,

Carried away by his own impetus,
like a rearing horse:

And, feeling the rope tight again round his neck,
Clenches his knuckles on his thighbone
with a crack

Uttering cries like mocking laughter,

And then like a mountebank into his booth,

Skips back into the dance to the music of the bones !
On the black gallows, one-armed friend,

The paladins are dancing, dancing

The lean, the devil's paladins

The skeletons of Saladins.
Track Name: The Three Part Medley of Nine Or So Men
Old man Wooden Boots
Tied his rope into a noose
And with a sigh, he wrapped it tight
And took a jump to cut his life

And short ole Cricket Coat
Did his best to cut his throat
But in attempt, he shook and slipped
And stuck the knife into his wrist

So what’s the moral of this story ?
Take your time, don’t ever worry
For if you're like Coat and Boots
You won’t quite make out chapter two

Which brings me to…

Long John Silver took his ride
His last ride of the night
Well who’d o’ thought that Long John Silver’d
Give up in his fight with Captain Sam
Damn you, Sam ! Let’s start anew
Damn you, Sam ! Send him to the ocean blue

Five old men from Newfoundland
Ran into the night and
Four were friends and three were dead
Who’s feeling them tonight ?

And two more men woke up that morning
Looking to the sky in mourning
One took his back on dirt and the grass
And looked him in the eye and said

"Now what’s the moral of this story ?
Give your love, your life, your glory
For the ones laid at your side
The lucky ones will never’ve died."
Track Name: Drink Up, Baby !
I went to the lake to fall in your arms
You weren't at the lake to hold me down

I took to the lake quiet and calm
As I felt the lake take to my lungs

You went to the lake, looking for some
Found me in the lake, what have I done ?

You took to the lake, tasted of me
Salted and bittersweet, drink up, baby !